Relentless Sprightliness!

Our beleaguered little Academy may be producing some downer posts right now, and for those of you who tune in for our usually relentless sprightliness, (truth in advertising, there it is) we do apologize.

"I can sympathize with everything, except suffering." Oscar Wilde

Seriously though, in the past I've noticed other unschooling blogpeeps go spiralling off into divorces, ill-health or tragedies, and have idly wondered whether I'd continue to post, if hurled unwillingly off-topic by some calamity.

Now the full force of the Unschooling Idea has strucken me over the noggin.

The tots aren't the only ones who've been unschooled - as this philosophy has become natural, it's become a conscious thing in my life too. Everything is a learning opportunity. Who says these explorations must be edited for pleasantness? Life refuses to be entirely about baking stuff and chopping worms in half to make two worms. Sometimes it ain't going to be delight-directed. Sometimes we're going to have learning thrust upon us.

"Never say, 'oops.' Always say, "Ah, interesting." ~Anonymous

Just because I wouldn't have hunted these experiences down and begged someone to inflict them on me, doesn't mean they aren't valuable, widening.

There is technical knowledge, like discovering huge reforms in family law have been made since my siblings and I were endangered by child psychologists and instructed to choose which parent we preferred.

But mostly, there is that stirring, awakening, thrilling thing bubbling quietly inside - it's one of those times when you can feel yourself changing. When you get to bust out of your skin and grow a new one, and every day you make choices about who this altered person will be - scheming, or truthful? Vindictive, or compassionate? Hardened to the world, or newly alive to it?

For some reason, it feels vitally important to conduct myself in a way I know I'll be able to live with on my deathbed, whether it "gets me what I want" or not. I tried, and failed (thanks to the Guinness) to articulate this to my oldest friend, Tinman, who did his best to comprehend my philosophical mutterings and was properly concerned that "nice guys finish last."

Maybe he's right. He's always been right about everything else. But I'm learning big stuff on this dark adventure about the ferocity of my love for my kids, about how I can consciously and repeatedly restore my own emotional equilibrium, rather than succumb to the Dark Side, and about the limits to what I'm willing to do to another person, to satisfy feelings of indignation and injustice.

HW

A warning to homeschooling parents

Now here is something that hadn't occurred to me, and I hope if any of you ever find yourself in a similar situation you will remember this post.

My increasingly litigious ex has decided to play on the general distrust of homeschooling to further his cause.

Having always been supportive of my homeschooling, if disinterested in its daily functioning, I have now been informed that he is going to use it against me. He has apparently recalled the key misconceptions about home education - misconceptions he has always mocked - and has been informing his legal people (who are not necessary, as I have always been willing to negotiate without outside interference) that he has "concerns" regarding the children's "socialization" and "isolation."

They are of course, only four and five, so technically I have been "preschooling" them at home. Did you know your former spouse could attempt to take your children from you by complaining that you mothered them at home until they were five?

Fascinating stuff, huh? In Ontario, your legal rights are spelled out (and can be defended by) The Ontario Federation of Teaching Parents.

HW

How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World: The Box Exercise

Years ago, my Dad gave me a book by Harry Browne called How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World: A Handbook for Personal Liberty.

At the time I had no idea who Browne was, and after my copy of the book fell to tatters from repeated consultations, I couldn't find it again as Dad always called it "Live Free or Die" and neither of us could remember what it was really titled.

Brunged up soaked in libertarian ideology, (although privately fermenting slightly more socialist views) I still found the book life-changing because it contains practical thought exercises, one of which I've been doing repeatedly to clear my mind during the present crisis.

Briefly, it works the following way, but I can't recommend the book highly enough - Browne has a way of cutting through the crap that is breathtakingly useful.

1. The idea is that every problem can be visualized as locking you in a Box.

2. Every problem, however seemingly insurmountable, also has clear solutions, usually more than one.

3. Each solution has an associated cost.

4. Your task is to identify the potential solutions to your problem, determine the total cost of each solution (financial, personal, etc.), and then decide if you are willing to pay the cost, to get out of the Box.

5. If you are NOT willing to pay the cost, you can then resume living with your problem, with the knowledge you are perfectly able to solve your problem but have chosen not to.

Ok, so climb into the Box, with your Problem.


It is also helpful to draw the Box on paper.

Let's pretend the problem is "I think I'm going to have a heart attack."

Now brainstorm all possible solutions to this problem, paying no heed to how sensible they are - just write down every way out.

For example:

"See a doctor"
"Eat less cheese"
"Begin some stress management thingies"
"Have heart removed and replaced with pig heart"

When you feel satisfied you have thought of everything, you gaze upon your list of solutions and consider the costs associated with each one.

Some solutions can be immediately crossed off, as they are too fantastic to be seriously entertained. "Eat less cheese" for example, is clearly ridiculous.


For solutions within the realm of the possible, you begin calculating the price you would have to pay for each one.

For example:

"Having heart removed and replaced with pig heart" may have both financial costs, costs in terms of your time (recuperation), and long term social costs. On the other hand, you might be able to generate revenue by doing rounds of talk shows.

After considering all the costs associated with all the possible solutions, you decide if you are willing to pay any of them, to escape from the Box.

If you are, you begin planning, or steeling yourself, to pay the costs and you are on your way.

This is just one exercise in a book chock full of 'shock you awake to the possibilities' ideas. I'm so glad it's been reissued, everyone should have one.

HW

Charles Darwin has a blog!

His writing has improved since he died, too.

Check it out here.

It's brand spanking new, but is already earning some pretty heavy (and well-deserved) coverage. In fact, Mr. Darwin's blog has already been touched by the Golden Tentacle.

Enjoy!

Kill Your Television April 21-27

This week is TV Turnoff Week.

The classic starting point for more information, and lots of culture jamming, dissing The Man good times, is Adbusters. I especially like their "You are the Product" theme, as I'm always ranting on and boring everyone rigid about society's slavish pandering to corporate interests.

(Ok, just one - they should be PAYING you, to wear their logos!!! What's wrong with all of you?! Kay, done.)

From a parenting perspective, the greatest resource I've found is the excellent blog Unplug Your Kids. Tons of links and inspiration for those teetering on the brink of tv-freeness.

They are hosting a great blog challenge, so grab this graphic and beetle over and sign up:


We can't really take this challenge because we don't have a TV.

Yes, the kids watch movies and carefully selected shows on the computer, but not everyday, and they don't see any commercials.

There are quality shows, and plenty of things I enjoy, as an adult, so I'm not tarnishing everything available on TV with the same brush. My personal beef with TV is twofold:

1. I don't like the 'habit.'

Just having the damn thing on for 'company' means you're not just allowing excellent nature documentaries, well-crafted dramas and Britcoms into your psyche - all sorts of bottom feeding corporate drivel starts to invade your brain.

2. Commercials.

My kids are not going to be trained to be little consumers. They are citizens. I refuse to allow corporate jingles to be memorized alongside nursery rhymes, in their little minds. I refuse to allow them to be bombarded with the corporate agenda of "More! Bigger! Better! Faster!", and I refuse to allow their ideas about human culture and human beauty to be warped by corporations who live to make a fast buck on the low self esteem and compensatory community-destroying materialistic competition it generates. If anyone is going to warp them, it will be me, dammit!

Having said that, we quite enjoy Charlie and Lola.

Fight the Power!

HW

Beagle Project Blog Spiffery

Go and check out the great new look at my favourite cause, The Beagle Project. Now it looks as exciting and brilliant, as it is.

At the Crossroads

This post is more personal than I usually get, but it's a strange time. I gotta write this stuff down and see if it looks sensible once it's out.

After years of living separate lives, a final split is pending, here at Free Range. This is a healthy, natural and long-overdue conclusion for the grownups, but a life-changing event for the little kiddies, and one I wished more than anything, to spare them.

Having been dragged through the muck sideways as a kid, during several divorces and splits among my parents, I was determined to succeed where they had failed. Goddamn it, I was going to make a happy family no matter who got killed. This extremity of thought has landed me in the muck just as surely as trying to emulate them would have. It's hard to see the middle way.

After giving up on the relationship, I spent several years seriously considering the idea of just muddling through until the kids were adults, 'sacrificing' myself to a 'pretend marriage' so the kids wouldn't have to endure the upheaval of divorce.

This completely clashed with my "role model" idea of parenting though. One day a friend said to me, "Would you want your daughter to make that choice?"

Of course not.

Nor, by extension, "Would you want your son to think that is the woman's role - that some abstract concept of the perfect family should take precedence over her own heart and happiness and will?"

And then I discovered people who had been wounded as children by their parents' lousy marriages. People who wished their parents had divorced. Who were emotionally crippled by the terrible, dysfunctional or dead model of a relationship they'd witnessed growing up.

And then I burst into a new realization, that there is such a thing as "healthy selfishness."

Just like the 'selfishness' of taking time away from your family to care for your own body and health, to take mental breaks and refill yourself with energy and inspiration, we have basic rights as living beings that no "idea" should intrude on. The right to own your own heart and soul, to live out your brief and shining life as you see fit, to experience joy and love and to be able to draw a clear, peaceful breath in your own home.

What kind of mother can I be, if I have boarded up my heart? What kind of role model am I, if I have deliberately stopped growing and learning and exploring because the only way I can survive is to shut myself down?

I decided, that even if though we will likely share custody, and I won't have my beautiful, wonderful, bright, loving children 100% of the time, (a thought that rips my heart out), I will be a much better mother, during the times we are together, if I am living 'authentically' as the self-help books say.

There was only so long, I could keep it up.

HW

Mothering Nature Education Fund

Jackie is a home educating Mom with small children. Her husband died very suddenly a few weeks ago.

She needs help, or she may not be able to continue homeschooling her kids.

Please click over to Poppy & Mei Days if you can make a donation to the fund that has been set up to assist her.

You can also support Jackie and her children by shopping at her Etsy store.

Thanks to La Casa Nella Prateria.

The Evolution Revolution Exhibit at the ROM

Beagle on over to The Beagle Project today to read Glendon Mellow's most excellent review of the Darwin exhibit, The Evolution Revolution, now on at the Royal Ontario Museum.

Glendon Mellow is the brilliant science-inspired artist behind The Flying Trilobite.

His gallery is here.

Get Out Yer Tastebuds

An excellent little project! We painted this giant poster of a tongue (what?! It looks like a tongue!) and then filled small bowls with lemon juice (sour), strong coffee (bitter), sugar water and salt water for sampling.

We tried applying the samples directly to the corresponding taste bud, for full flavour, and we tried applying them carefully to the 'wrong' tastebud.

I asked the kids to guess what would happen when we put lemon juice on the 'sweet' tastebud - they thought it would still taste sour, but lo and behold - applied to the 'wrong' tastebud, everything was tasteless!

Swish water around in between samples.

Marley was annoyed I couldn't locate the "hamburger" tastebud.

HW

Yes, but were they organic?

Me: "So what did you guys have for lunch?"

Marley: "Chinchillas."

Me: "Chinchillas!"

Marley: "Yup. I didn't like them."

Me: "Noooo . . . what did you . . . ah . . . have with them?"

Marley: "Cheese."

Me: "Obviously."

Our Own Personal Zoo

What to do, what to do . . . ah! Go to the zoo! The almost completely empty zoo!

The winter my friends. Go to the zoo, in the weeeeeeeeenter. Yes sirree.

Studying gorillas...


Still studying gorillas....



Observing dwarf crocodiles...


Escaping from dwarf crocodiles in dugout canoe...


Watching butterflies...and then the nice Insect & Arachnid Keeper introduced us to a Giant Indian Striped Spider. It was super!



We were able to hog the attentions of the nice man behind the Touchy Feely Counter, and fondle snake skins, orangutan hair, assorted skulls, feathers and furs while he chatted away. We may never go in the summer again.


HW

Real Seville Marmalade from The Good Ship Taio

The area near Seville, Spain where we have spent the past eighteen months on board Taio has literally millions of orange trees. Eating and juice oranges are grown on a vast scale. Immediately beside us is a small orange grove which produces the most delicious eating oranges we have ever had. In fact, I was never particularly keen on oranges until we had the fruit from that little grove.

Ornamental Seville orange trees which produce the fruit beloved of marmalade makers line the streets of cities and towns throughout Spain. When the orange trees blossom, as they have for the past few weeks, the air is heavy with the scent, particularly at night.



When the Spanish see us picking Seville oranges, they must think we are mad since the fruit is absolutely inedible until transformed into marmalade, a British invention originally intended as a way of preserving oranges for those months when they weren’t available fresh.
Marmalade is something of a rarity in Spain.

We have made Seville orange, lemon and lime marmalade while here and we love them all. Commercial marmalade doesn’t remotely compare to what you can make from three simple ingredients. We always add the extra peel and zest to get a strongly flavored, not-too-sweet marmalade with lots of delicious peel. The lime marmalade is as close to heaven as a
non-believer is likely to get.

Traditional Seville Orange Marmalade

1 kg. Seville oranges (pick when the peel is fully orange)
1.8 kg. sugar
2.25 litres water

If you, poor thing, cannot get Seville oranges, use plain old eating oranges but substitute lemons for about one quarter of the weight. The result won't be as good as Seville marmalade but it'll probably be better than anything you can buy.

Optional ingredients:

We add both of these to get a really zingy, flavourful marmalade:
The peel, cut into strips, of two extra oranges
The zest from two extra oranges

Put the water into a pot. Cut the kilo of fruit into halves. Squeeze the juice out and add it to the water. Scrape all the pulp and pips from the fruit and place in a muslin bag. Tie it closed and hang the bag in the water, tying a string to one of the pot handles to make removal easy.
Cut all of the peel into shreds about 5 cm long and 5mm wide. If you want the extra peel and zest, prepare this now but do NOT put it into the pot.

Simmer the peel and zest in the water/juice mixture for about two hours until the peel is just getting soft. Remove the bag of pips and let cool. When cool, squeeze all of the jelly-like stuff out of the bag and put it into the water/juice mixture. Make sure you get it all, this
contains the pectin which makes the marmalade set.

Over low heat, pour in the sugar slowly, stirring constantly until it is fully dissolved. Raise heat to high and boil very fast, stirring often. After about fifteen minutes drop a bit of the syrup on a cold saucer. If it sets, the marmalade is done. If not, continue to boil and test. It may take considerably more than fifteen minutes. Be patient and keep testing. If you undercook, it will be runny. If you overcook, it will be dark and lacking a bit in flavour although it will still be completely edible and a great base for chutney, see below.

When the marmalade sets on the saucer, turn off the heat and let stand for twenty minutes. Then stir the foam into the marmalade and pour into clean jars which have been heated in the oven at medium heat for at least ten minutes. Cap immediately. Makes about 7 medium-sized jars.

You can make lemon or lime marmalade by substituting the same quantity of fruit. Keep the proportions of fruit, sugar and water the same.

If you like Indian food, any of these marmalades mixed with a bit of HP Sauce makes a great, quick chutney.


TAIO

Happy Birthday Marley!

My sweet little man is four.

We were all half dead from a nasty wee something called "strep throat". . . never had it before, will cheerfully saw my own head off before having it again . . .


We somehow rallied round, everyone had a bath, put on some decent clothes and teetered into the light (it burns! it burns!) for a very exclusive Quarantine Party!

In the morning we made an ice cream cake, since no one could swallow anything else... I was so feverish I put all the candles in the package on his cake, instead of just four.

I know, the Mommy Police are after me now. Sigh.


Thanks again to all our far-flung family and friends for the treasures that rained upon us in time for his birthday.


This was the hit of the day. Thomas, in combination with Dinosaurs. The picture says it all.

He's still just standing there, clutching it like that, now.


Happy Birthday, darlin' boy.

HW

Unschooling in Action: The Solar System

One morning, Marley started asking Questions.

"What is Outer Space?"

"How do we float in Outer Space without falling down?"

"Who can live on the Sun if it's so hot?"

So I whipped out a notebook and made some sketches and we nattered.


Then it started getting heavy, so I brought in the science textbooks.

By which I mean, of course, The Magic Schoolbus: Lost in The Solar System.


After that, there was no option but to take a crack at the glorious mobile shown in the book.

I'm really glad I collect random craft supplies.

Soon we had all the planets ready to roll.

We decided to keep Pluto.


We didn't have the right equipment to make the planets orbit-able, but we indicated relative distance from the sun by the length of twine used.

The planets are suspended from "Outer Space" - Marley painted the stars, and told me they were so big because "every star is really a sun, and the sun is big."


I just couldn't get the whole thing into one good shot, but you get the idea.

They put the rings on Saturn, the rays of light on the Sun, and we've since hung little labels on every planet. Before breakfast, we chant the names of the planets, from Mercury to Pluto, with great glee.

This little spontaneous project has led to a rip-roaring fascination with all things astronomical, and Marley will now corner you and tell you all about ice volcanoes and gas giants, water planets and (my favourite) Aster Noids . . . if you come too close.


A companion solar system, with alien planets and Space Penguins, is under construction.

HW

Forty Feet of Snow Fell Every Night

It's melting now...but during the Infamous Blog Blackout, it snowed. A lot.

And then a bit more.



The icicles grew much longer, but we didn't get a picture...from the inside it looked like we were in an ethereal and sparkly prison...






Naturally, I was busy timing how fast the snow was pelting down . . . (this was my head uncovered for ten seconds)

Oh, and doing this....


HW

Visit to Alcazar

This wonderful photo essay is a guest post by my seafaring Dad.

Dad and Carol live aboard the Good Ship Taio and go where the wind takes them!

Lately they've grown round, lazy and brown, basking in the hot Spanish sun eating oranges all day and Salsa dancing all night, instead of rounding horns and capes, documenting the melting poles, and retracing ancient silk and spice trading routes, as was expected of them . . . still, they beam us some mean photographs and spin a good yarn. Over to you, Dad:

After eighteen months in Seville, Spain, we finally made it to the Alcazar, the Moorish/Spanish palace which many people say is as wonderful as the Alhambra in Grenada.


It is, in fact, absolutely lovely. We had always planned to go on a perfect day, sunny but not too hot, out of the peak tourist season. The day we chose was, in fact, perfect. Lovely sunshine and the scent of orange blossoms everywhere.


The oldest parts of the Alcazar date back to 913 and it's had an endless succession of occupants who have added to it and rebuilt various bits over the years.


I think everyone is agreed that the most beautiful parts of the Alcazar are those in the Moorish style with fabulously intricate plasterwork. Most of the Moorish parts date back to the 11th and 12th centuries although Catholic kings sometimes made additions in the Moorish style.



In the fourteenth century King Pedro the Cruel (or King Pedro the Just if you were on his good side) had a Muslim ally in Granada, Mohammed V, who sent artisans to make additions to the Alcazar, so even when in the hand of the Christians, construction in the beautiful Moorish architectural style continued.


The whole thing is surrounded by very high walls enclosing lovely gardens and parklike areas. A few luck Sevillianos have houses whose top floor windows look into the Alcazar's gardens.


Captain Grandad...



The lovely Carol...



(This is a swimming pool!)


(close up of mosaic ceiling shown above)

The Fruit Stand in my Eyes

Scooby: "Before I was in your tummy, I was just the Apple in your Eye, right?"

Me: "Er...well...maybe you were a Twinkle?"

Scooby: "No, not a Twinkle. I was the Apple in your Eye."

Me: "Alrighty."

Scooby: "But now that I'm big, I'm a big giant Mango in your Eye! Right?!"

Viva la Feminista!

And...we're almost back!

To warm up, I thought I'd promote the wildly brave female-positive site, The Shape of a Mother, where real postpartum womenfolk send in naked photos of their real bodies.


What an honest and compassionate project this is . . . every friend I've ever recommended this site to, has made a point of thanking me. The woman who runs this thing is really, really helping people.

When I found it, I was staggered by the triviality of my own, previously bemoaned "injuries of motherhood" compared to many of the women pictured and swore to view them as Mother Warrior Goddess thingies. You know what I'm talking about.

HW

BlogKeeping

For anybody still left wondering where they went, Yellow House has moved!

(Not from France. Just the blog....)

I have lately discovered some new Learning in Freedomers (new to me, that is!) and have been enjoying:

La Casa Nella Prateria (France)

Poppy and Mei Days (Japan)

Sugar Boot and Weasel (United States)

(Laptop crisis unabated. Will be resolved shortly. Please note I can only be reached through freerangekids AT gmail DOT com or through Facebook. I am NOT receiving messages sent to my main account. Thanks to everyone for Get Well wishes sent to the laptop. It is being very brave.)

HW